Parents

Parenting is a tough job.  When we accept a child into our lives, we accept a profound commitment to them.

 

Children look to their parents for:

  • strong positive messages about belonging
  • opportunities for achievement to help build self-esteem
  • tools for safely exploring the world
  • models of self-reliance and self-discipline ( sometimes no fun!)
  • boundaries
  • learning the difference between popularity and character

 

Parent-directed activities provide learning moments:

  • Chores that teach responsibility
  • The difference between being a guest and being family
  • How to deal with chaos and emergencies
  • The balance between freedom and control
  • The united family at work and play

 

Freebie for the day:

Children in charge create chaos.  They do not have enough experience to be in charge and actually become fearful when allowed too much control.  On the other hand, over-controlling parents beget controlling children, so achieving a balance is the art of parenting.

Speaking with one voice is imperative.  The answer to a child’s question “Is it OK if I . . .?” is “Let me check with [spouse], and we will get back to you.”  Instant answers not required as much as UNITED answers.  A child will manipulate only as much as the parents allow.  Unfortunately, the more the child manipulates successfully, the greater the danger for the marital relationship . . . and the worse it is for the child.

 

Give me a call if you need some help with this beautiful and terrifying job of parenting.